How would you react to this?

[anonymushroom]

So this morning my friend sent me a copy of this email she was planning on sending to her ex, who is a mutual friend, as a 'what-do-you-think?'

She didn't wait for a response, though, because twenty minutes later, her ex forwarded it to me, and a number of their other mutual friends. I assume this menas he isn't going to go for it. She's quite pretty, but maybe he actually loves his girlfriend? Anyway, I thought I'd share, since it's already everywhere.

What are you doing tonight?
Yeah, that’s a booty call.
Let’s be fully clear about this:

I’m not going to give it up and let you sleep with me, but I still want to hook up with you. I’m thinking a good bj might be a good compromise. But we have to do ithow I like.

1. We go out for drinks, you don’t have to drive but I plan on getting a good buzz. You talk to me and we have conversation. Like you don’t expect anything. For at least three hours.
2. What I do to you is your guide of what to do to me. Don’t move faster on me than I do on you. If I put my hand on your leg, you can put yours on mine but not up my skirt, that kind of thing. What I’m doing is the max.
3. We’ll go back to your place, or somewhere else. Not mine, would make me feel too guilty.
4. I will tie your hands to the bed; strip down to my corset; slide alllll over you, tease you, and finally blow you.
5. Provided your last test was clean, I’ll be blowing you condom free and I will swallow every drop of your cum.

Can you live with my deal? Are you wondering why we haven’t done this yet? You always play me wrong. You just hit on me too hard instead of sitting back and letting me come to you. It’s when you’re all over me that I get turned off. Let me feel in control, talk to me like you aren’t expecting anything, and you’ll get it.

I know what I said about my new bf… I’m not technically dating this guy, I just know he’s going to ask me out when he gets back from his overseas trip in like a week. I know you have a girlfriend but let’s face it; she’s not as awesome as I am. You’re leaving town. This is our last window of opportunity. Let’s take it.

a) how would you respond to this?
b) have you ever received anything like this?
c) would any of the forum ladies ever write anything like this?
d) if it's morally reprehensible but still technically not cheating, does that make it okay?

I don't know whether it's awesome or foolish. A bit of both, I think.

[LastMan]

I would never get that letter, but again the phrase 'on it like sonic' comes to mind.

[LastMan]

Her ex is the morally reprehensible one

[Narcissist]

She sounds like a total control freak

[anonymushroom]

Originally Posted by LastMan

Her ex is the morally reprehensible one

For emailing it around? Yes.
For breaking up with her in the first place? Plain retarded. She's literally at least a 9.5.

Originally Posted by Narcissist

She sounds like a total control freak

She is a bit, but she's pretty.

[AdversityStrikes]

a) how would you respond to this?

Chuckle, delete the e-mail and forget about it five minutes later.

b) have you ever received anything like this?

Yes, but none of those ridiculous stipulations.

c) would any of the forum ladies ever write anything like this?

I get PMs like this from them every day.

d) if it's morally reprehensible but still technically not cheating, does that make it okay?

It's cheating on his part, so that's morally reprehensible. That list of demands is the biggest turn-off in the universe, why the hell would I ever want to spend time with someone like that?

[Narcissist]

Originally Posted by anonymushroom

She's literally at least a 9.5.

Pics would much improve this thread.

He should just delete it for the lulz since she is so full of herself in the email with the stuff he did 'wrong' before and stipulations etc. If he breaks her rules how is it going to go? "NO! YOU CAN ONLY PUT YOUR HAND ON MY LEG IF I'VE DONE IT FIRST"

[LastMan]

Originally Posted by anonymushroom

For emailing it around? Yes.
For breaking up with her in the first place? Plain retarded. She's literally at least a 9.5.

She is a bit, but she's pretty.

Why can't a nice guy like me get an offer like that from an HB 9.5 in a corset?

[anonymushroom]

Originally Posted by AdversityStrikes

It's cheating on his part, so that's morally reprehensible. That list of demands is the biggest turn-off in the universe, why the hell would I ever want to spend time with someone like that?

a) This is why:


b) I don't think he's going to do it, but I'm more her friend than his, so I only care about her morality.

[CrackBaby]

Originally Posted by Narcissist

Pics would much improve this thread.

seriously